Monday, April 03, 2006

What is our response?

Mohammed al-Hujairi from the village of Irsal suffered four gunshot wounds while planting trees along with several farmers in the region of Zamrani that is five kilometers deep into Lebanese territory
In response, I wish to propose to fellow Lebanese a new Resistance....

Hizb-e-Shaitan.

Funded by the United States of America - The Shaitan-el-Akbar.

Deployed across the Eastern and Northern borders of Lebanon.

Hizb-e-Shaitan will be armed with intermediate ballistic missiles targetted at Damascus, and will be manned by only one sect of Lebanese - the Shaitan-worshipers. This sect will receive exclusive social benefits, schools, hospitals, and so on from the Hizb, on condition that they vote for it in local and national elections, and wear the recommended attire: 2-piece bikinis for women and speedos for men.

Hizb-e-Shaitan is necessary because the Lebanese Army is too weak to defend the Lebanese against the never-ending aggression of that bitch-of-a-sister, Syria. Besides, it is in the interest of the Lebanese state to allow the Hizb to operate because when it launches attacks, retaliations will be limmited to the Hizb's positions.

Hizb-e-Shaitan will only work for Lebanese interests. It's weapons will perpetually be pointed outwards. However, if...

Those in favor of this proposal, say Aye!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Awesome!

-Sayyed Jun Luc

Anonymous said...

Aye!

-Sayyed J'encule

Anonymous said...

Given the bitch-of-a-sister Syria, that clearly makes Lahouss a son-of-a-bitch, among other things naturally.

I nominate Sayyed Raja Hasha-allah as the hizb's secretary general! You ready to grow out a nasty beard?

JoseyWales said...

Unfortutately, from Hezballah to SANIORA passing through dog Lahoud, the response will be:

"But..but..but we WANT goood relations with sisterly Arab Syria" and more people will get killed and the state keeps losing respect. Scratch that last part, the state has zero respect left.